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Are You Elite?

A "real Americans"/"non-elites" quiz has been making the rounds. The questions and my answers on the flip.

1. Can you talk about "Mad Men?" Yes.

2. Can you talk about the "The Sopranos?" Yes.

3. Do you know who replaced Bob Barker on "The Price Is Right?" Nope.

4. Have you watched an Oprah show from beginning to end? Never watched Oprah in my life.

5. Can you hold forth animatedly about yoga?Nope.

6. How about pilates? Nope.

7. How about skiing? Nope.

8. Mountain biking? Nope.

9. Do you know who Jimmie Johnson is? Yep. Champion NASCAR racer. I also know who Jimmy Johnson is -- former football coach and current spokesperson for male enhancement products.

10. Does the acronym MMA mean nothing to you? Mixed Martial Arts. Not a fan.

11. Can you talk about books endlessly? Well, some books anyway.

12. Have you ever read a "Left Behind" novel? Nope.

13. How about a Harlequin romance? I've read romances, but not a Harlequin romance.

14. Do you take interesting vacations? Nope.

15. Do you know a great backpacking spot in the Sierra Nevada? Not the Sierra Nevada or anywhere.

16. What about an exquisite B and B overlooking Boothbay Harbor? Wha?

17. Would you be caught dead in an RV? Not by choice.

18. Would you be caught dead on a cruise ship? Not by choice.

19. Have you ever heard of of Branson, Mo? Yes. Vegas for the Bible Belt. Never plan on going there.

20. Have you ever attended a meeting of a Kiwanis Club? Nope.

21. How about the Rotary Club? Nope.

22. Have you lived for at least a year in a small town? I grew up in a small town.

23. Have you lived for a year in an urban neighborhood in which most of your neighbors did not have college degrees? No idea. I did not go around asking for credentials.

24. Have you spent at least a year with a family income less than twice the poverty line? Nope.

25. Do you have a close friend who is an evangelical Christian? Nope.

26. Have you ever visited a factory floor? "Visited?" No. Worked on a factory floor. Yes.

27. Have you worked on one? Yes.

I think Drum proposes some additional questions that makes sense - did you go to a public university, et al. Here are my proposed additions:

a. Did you go to public school? Yes.

b. Did you go to public university? No.

c. Did you go to public graduate school. No.

d. Do you follow college football? Very much so.

e. Do you follow association football (soccer)? Yes.

f. Do you eat at fast food restaurants? Yes.

g. Do you eat fried chicken? Yes.

h. Do you eat meat? Yes.

i. Have you ever visited Europe? Yes.

j. Do you own a gun? No.

Can you think of any other relevant question regarding "real American-ness?" BTW, how to score this? I dunno. Someone needs to come up with a chart or something.

Speaking for me only

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  • Display: Sort:
    Here's the quiz version I prefer (5.00 / 1) (#3)
    by Ellie on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 12:52:23 PM EST
    1. Can you talk about "Mad Men?" Yes.
    2. Really? Really??


    There are no elites down here in the South :) (5.00 / 1) (#5)
    by republicratitarian on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:05:05 PM EST


    I'm stymied. How do I score (5.00 / 2) (#9)
    by KeysDan on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:15:29 PM EST
    number 25?  I do have a good friend who is an evangelical Christian, but only when his wife is present.

    More questions... (5.00 / 1) (#15)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:23:51 PM EST
    "Grey Goose or Smirnoff?"

    "Sierra Nevada or Coors?"

    "Do you save roaches?"

    Ha (5.00 / 1) (#28)
    by republicratitarian on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:40:05 PM EST
    Do you save roaches?=Elite

    Do you have roaches?=Not Elite

    Parent

    what if its (none / 0) (#34)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:50:43 PM EST
    yes to both

    Parent
    Yes to both=closet elite (none / 0) (#46)
    by republicratitarian on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:01:15 PM EST
    Then you live in NY (none / 0) (#48)
    by scribe on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:05:15 PM EST
    and are automatically elite.

    Parent
    I was thinking... (none / 0) (#45)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:59:54 PM EST
    elites threw away their roaches actually, and real Americans save 'em up for a roach bone.

    Parent
    do you have (none / 0) (#17)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:26:29 PM EST
    roaches

    Parent
    LOL... (5.00 / 1) (#21)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:30:06 PM EST
    half the elites in NYC have bedbugs...need of extermination services is no longer a quality indicator, at least in NYC.

    Parent
    better question might be (none / 0) (#22)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:31:29 PM EST
    do you pay more than 200 bucks and ounce

    Parent
    I don't wanna be an elitist... (none / 0) (#30)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:45:15 PM EST
    I plead the fifth:)

    Or that one requires a follow up...'If you answered yes, does said lid cost more than half your paycheck?'

    How bout this one..."What tax form do you fill out?"  1040-EZ Non-Elite baby!

    Parent

    I hate to break it to you (none / 0) (#33)
    by CST on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:50:16 PM EST
    but you live in NY, automatically-elite.

    I'm pretty sure the entire questionnaire could have been summed up in 4 questions:

    "Are you white?"
    "Do you live on the west coast?"
    "Do you live on the east coast north of Virginia?"
    "Do you watch Fox News (and expect real news)?"

    If you answered - yes. no. no. yes.  Congrats!  real American.

    Parent

    Au contraire CST... (none / 0) (#41)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:57:23 PM EST
    lack of a checking account is automatic non-elite...I've covered my bases kid:)  

    And there are some real redneck pockets of the NYC suburbs...some where people actually follow NASCAR and stuff.  I sh*t you not.  

    Parent

    I am so excited (none / 0) (#44)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:59:48 PM EST
    that I finally found a reliable connection for dirt weed.  

    Parent
    sorry (none / 0) (#49)
    by CST on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:08:28 PM EST
    no checking account includes too many non-whites.

    There was a time I didn't have a checking account.  Pretty sure no one was inviting me to the real America party though.

    NASCAR followers in NYC 'burbs are "closet elitists".  If they were real Americans they'd move.

    Parent

    You're crushing... (none / 0) (#64)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:25:46 PM EST
    my world view to pieces right now...you mean all my parties aren't real America parties? They're always excercises in life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

    We need to take the real America mantle back from the false prophets.

    Parent

    I was in Newark last week (none / 0) (#56)
    by me only on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:15:43 PM EST
    Urban Rednecks abound.

    Parent
    Dang! (none / 0) (#43)
    by MileHi Hawkeye on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:59:32 PM EST
    So very close...

    Parent
    Ewwwwww (none / 0) (#81)
    by Militarytracy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:40:35 PM EST
    Yer makin me itchy

    Parent
    how about (5.00 / 1) (#39)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:55:56 PM EST
    sweet tea or unsweetened tea?

    isn't that (none / 0) (#52)
    by Ga6thDem on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:13:32 PM EST
    what the civil was was fought over? /Snark.

    Seriously, I would think that would be north versus south type of thing as when I have been up north the majority of the restaurants only offer unsweetened tea whereas in the south you have to ask for it.

    Parent

    I hate sweet tea (none / 0) (#53)
    by Militarytracy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:13:44 PM EST
    BUT....my granddaughters drink it in their sippy cups.  It is my fault.  I'm the one who moved all the family ovaries here, but by God they will be some liberal sweet tea sippers if I have anything to say about it :)

    Parent
    at thanksgiving (5.00 / 1) (#79)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:38:01 PM EST
    there is a small decanter of unsweetened tea.  just for me.


    Parent
    Real sweet tea is as sweet as strong... (none / 0) (#70)
    by rhbrandon on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:28:35 PM EST
    Otherwise, it's the stuff you buy at McDonalds. Or Shoney's or Bob Evans'.

    My dad's brother-in-law worked a small number of oil wells in western Kentucky in the family business, and that's how my aunt made his tea for him. Didn't drink coffee that I remember.

    It's also how I got hooked on caffiene by the age of 9, one visit to Bowling Green at a time. Neither of my parents ever doctored their coffee; I'm a wimp in that regard.

    Parent

    Or... (none / 0) (#54)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:14:24 PM EST
    does your version of Iced Tea come from a canister of brown sugar powder?

    Parent
    Ha! Does your coffee cream ignite? (none / 0) (#58)
    by Militarytracy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:18:36 PM EST
    or not need (5.00 / 1) (#59)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:19:25 PM EST
    refrigeration

    Parent
    What is an interesting vacation? (5.00 / 1) (#66)
    by Militarytracy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:26:54 PM EST
    Interesting to me, or to other people, or to the NSA?

    I have had a couple that were (none / 0) (#69)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:28:32 PM EST
    The first question (none / 0) (#1)
    by CST on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 12:46:11 PM EST
    should have been:

    "Are you white?"

    Also - what's the difference between a harlequin romance novel and a regular romance novel?  I guess if you have to ask...

    I must be really elite... (none / 0) (#2)
    by seabe on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 12:46:47 PM EST
    I only answered yes to three of them.

    Me too.... (none / 0) (#4)
    by vml68 on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 12:59:12 PM EST
    except I thought that made me really "non-elite".

    Don't you have to be pretty elite to know about an exquisite B&B in Booth Bay harbor?

    Parent

    Not if you're there... (5.00 / 3) (#32)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:50:08 PM EST
    to make the beds:)

    Parent
    "real American-ness?" (none / 0) (#6)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:12:35 PM EST
    have you been in a WalMart in the last 30 days.

    do you have a Hammacher Schlemmer catalog in your house.

    do you have cable.

    do pay more than $80 bucks a month for cable.

    have you ever made or eaten a casserole made with Durkee Onion Rings

    do you use Mayo or Miracle Whip

    do you use Redi Whip or Cool Whip

    one more (none / 0) (#8)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:14:49 PM EST
    can you pronounce Quesadilla

    Parent
    "Make yourself a dang quesadilla." (none / 0) (#11)
    by sarcastic unnamed one on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:16:22 PM EST
    Only elites know which movie that's from...

    Parent
    I am (none / 0) (#13)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:20:01 PM EST
    so elite

    Parent
    Uncle Rico... (none / 0) (#16)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:25:33 PM EST
    is eating all the damn steaks!

    Parent
    Do the chickens have large talons? (none / 0) (#23)
    by sarcastic unnamed one on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:32:12 PM EST
    Amusing list, but (none / 0) (#68)
    by brodie on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:28:18 PM EST
    some is dated.  Like circa 1985.

    Quesadillas?  Popular and trendy back in the Regan era.  Too much cheese -- elite vegans no like.

    Haymaker-Schlemiel?  Again, a hot store back when Ronnie ruled.  Conspicuous consumption for the class insecure types trying to one-up their neighbors.  Today, mostly non-elite.

    Cable over $80?  Only if you're going for quality premium channels, and not the horror/action/schlock they have on some junk premium offerings.

    All Whips and mayo -- non-elite.  Elites only eat real food, and mayo is now veganaise only , please.  Even the whip stuff they top some drinks with at Starbucks is no longer elite.  Starbucks in fact is no longer elite.

    My deux centimes as an elitist.

    Parent

    Haymaker-Schlemiel? (none / 0) (#72)
    by Militarytracy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:31:08 PM EST
    I can't quit laughing

    Parent
    Hey, I'm surprised (none / 0) (#93)
    by brodie on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:49:05 PM EST
    H-S is still in business.

    Back around the time the term "yuppie" was gaining currency, i.e. about 1984, there was no hotter store in which to be seen at the local upscale shopping center.  

    That and Banana République.  Both belong to the 80s, imo.

    Parent

    no comment (none / 0) (#74)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:31:51 PM EST
    on the Durkee Onion Ring question I see.

    Parent
    Well that's because you (none / 0) (#83)
    by brodie on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:41:38 PM EST
    had my mind going around in circles on that one.  

    Confusing too.  I thought Durkee did donuts?

     

    Parent

    here (none / 0) (#85)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:43:01 PM EST
    sorry (none / 0) (#91)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:46:07 PM EST
    that one is sort of elitist.  a real non elite recipe would have called for a CAN of green beans.

    Parent
    its funny (none / 0) (#84)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:41:53 PM EST
    once I learned how easy it is to make, you know, actual whipped cream I have always been amazed that there is even a market for that stuff.


    Parent
    I thought homemade... (5.00 / 1) (#98)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 03:09:00 PM EST
    whipped cream was a ruse to legally sell retail nitrous...people actually make whipped cream with the little nitrous cannisters?

    Parent
    there's a dirty joke here... (none / 0) (#87)
    by CST on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:43:52 PM EST
    a few actually

    Parent
    what if you make your own mayo? (none / 0) (#88)
    by nycstray on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:43:58 PM EST
    well (5.00 / 2) (#94)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:49:41 PM EST
    smell you

    Parent
    12 yeses for me. (none / 0) (#7)
    by sarcastic unnamed one on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:14:27 PM EST
    Owning a gun makes you elite?

    Not if it's an assault rifle. (5.00 / 1) (#27)
    by republicratitarian on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:38:34 PM EST
    I don't think (none / 0) (#12)
    by CST on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:18:33 PM EST
    it's a straight yes/no quiz.

    We need an answer key.

    I doubt living in a small town or hanging out in RVs makes you elite either.

    Parent

    Depends on what kind, I suppose. (none / 0) (#47)
    by scribe on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:02:31 PM EST
    Better questions would be
    "Did you pay more than $1000 (adjusted for inflation) for any of your guns?

    "Imported side by side or domestic semi-automatic shotgun?"

    "Walnut or synthetic stock?"

    "Trap or skeet?"

    You can't even try to break down fishing habits of flyfishing v. non-flyfishing to determine who's elite and who's not.  I know/have met any number of fly anglers, from all strata of society, and a lot of the rural coots with scraggly beards and beat up pickup trucks who make their living doing something rural can cast and catch fish many times better than the urban sophisticates.  (Though an elitist is more likely to call a particular pattern of fly a "Montreal courtesan" as opposed to a "Montreal wh*re".)

    Parent

    Ah, yes. True. Although... (none / 0) (#61)
    by sarcastic unnamed one on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:22:09 PM EST
    there's a difference between trap and skeet? I guess if you have to ask...

    Parent
    anyway (none / 0) (#10)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:15:42 PM EST
    the think is dated.  the first two questions should have been about Boardwalk Empire and Dexter.


    I would define elite by income (none / 0) (#14)
    by Coral on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:20:21 PM EST
    not by cultural tastes. Plenty of people I know have highly developed tastes and education, but are poor and only managing to scratch out a living or provide an education for their kids.

    On the other hand (none / 0) (#106)
    by eric on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:30:47 PM EST
    I know plenty of people that make good money but are plenty plebe.  

    Parent
    The key to the quiz (none / 0) (#18)
    by Big Tent Democrat on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:26:49 PM EST
    Non-elite answers are No to 1, 2, 5, 6, 7, 8, 11, 14, 15, 16 and i.

    The rest require yes answers for non-eliteness.

    I am pretty elite (none / 0) (#19)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:29:03 PM EST
    except for once owning an RV

    Parent
    you think (none / 0) (#20)
    by CST on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:29:08 PM EST
    real americans follow soccer?

    Parent
    Nope (none / 0) (#24)
    by Big Tent Democrat on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:32:30 PM EST
    My mistake. That's a no vote also.

    Parent
    hmmm (none / 0) (#103)
    by Maryb2004 on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:06:02 PM EST
    I'm non-elite.  Must be one of the advantages of living in the home-state of Branson and not having cable ...

    At least they didn't give extra credit for having BEEN to Branson.

    Parent

    Extra credit should be given (none / 0) (#119)
    by MO Blue on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 08:20:11 PM EST
    to people who went to Branson when it mainly consisted of Silver Dollar City with rides and people displaying country crafts.

    Parent
    That's when I was there. (none / 0) (#120)
    by Maryb2004 on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 11:15:50 PM EST
    Family vacation when I was a kid.

    Of COURSE I take interesting vacations.  Lol!

    Parent

    about the gay Lincoln thing (none / 0) (#25)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:32:38 PM EST
    how long till Fox News has a smearing Lincoln segment?

    oops (none / 0) (#26)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:34:57 PM EST
    should have been in the open

    Parent
    Maybe a good question (none / 0) (#31)
    by ruffian on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:47:24 PM EST
    Do you think Lincoln was gay?
     elite = yes, non-elite =no

    Parent
    Hmm, I think we're (none / 0) (#80)
    by brodie on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:38:21 PM EST
    getting ahead of the curve too far on that one.  As of now, you still have a majority of elitists (historians and those who read them) who would hold with the old paradigm.

    I think the distinction is Have you heard about the Lincoln is gay controversy?  Elite yes of course.

    Parent

    This is sad (none / 0) (#29)
    by lilburro on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:41:42 PM EST
    14. Do you take interesting vacations? Nope.

    I cannot talk about the Sopranos.  But I have wasted a significant amount of time today at work reading about Deadwood...

    reading about Deadwood? (none / 0) (#35)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:52:02 PM EST
    have you seen it?  its excellent.  and I dont even like westerns.

    Im sure its on netflix

    Parent

    my favorite ever HBO show (none / 0) (#40)
    by ruffian on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:57:10 PM EST
    Liked it better than Sopranos.

    Parent
    it would be my second fav (none / 0) (#42)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:58:38 PM EST
    after Carnival

    Parent
    I'm almost (none / 0) (#50)
    by lilburro on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:10:40 PM EST
    at the end of the 2nd season.  It's my favorite show ever.  It's weird because it ended just as the era of incessant online television analysis began so I can't get my usual fix of online discussion (you can find more material out there on Modern Family than on Deadwood, and I like Modern Family but, c'mon).  I am chomping at the bit (har har har) for Milch's new series Luck.

    Anyway, I didn't have HBO when Deadwood, The Wire, or The Sopranos aired.  So I'm still catching up.

    Parent

    if you like fantasy/weirdness (none / 0) (#57)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:16:13 PM EST
    you will want to also check out the HBO series Carnival.  still IMO one of the best things ever on tv.
    it was just before Deadwood.

    Parent
    I liked it too (none / 0) (#71)
    by Militarytracy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:28:38 PM EST
    my favorite thing about that series (none / 0) (#75)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:34:49 PM EST
    it made you really think about what it would be like to be "tarred and feathered".
    a process that seems sort of funny. that you have heard about all your life but probably never really considered what it would be like to have boiling hot tar spread on your skin and stuffed in your mouth.


    Parent
    Europe (none / 0) (#36)
    by waldenpond on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:53:38 PM EST
    but then states he's been to Europe which would be an interesting vacation for me.

    I on the other hand have been on a cruise.  It was not interesting.  You would have to kill me and drag my dead body on board to get me to participate in another.

    Parent

    thanks for confirming (none / 0) (#37)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:55:18 PM EST
    my suspicions.  I always thought it would be like going to Vegas except you would be trapped in a confined space with the rubes.

    Parent
    Nah, I've done it and would do it again. (none / 0) (#51)
    by sarcastic unnamed one on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:12:24 PM EST
    Didn't think I'd like it much beforehand, but we had a great time. We went to the caribbean, probably 7 years ago. Ditched the kids (about 1 and 4 at the time) with some good friends for the week.

    The cruise was like becoming a 20-something again, mostly because the weather was so bad the ship couldn't dock for several days at a time.

    Wake up real late, like 11-12. Get a little breakfast. Run, workout. Take a little nap/TV time. Call the kids. Go to happy hour. Change into something nice. Eat at the late seating with some friends. Hit our favorite martini bar, down some appletinis made by our favorite bartender. Go the club, chat with the DJ and get the kind of music we like played. Jump around for hours. Close the club at 4AM. Sleep until 11-12. Start all over again.

    No work, no diapers, no cooking, no responsibilities. Really fond memories.

    Parent

    honestly (none / 0) (#55)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:14:48 PM EST
    the only cruise I ever thought sound like fun is the Alaska cruises.   not much interest in beach cruising.

    Parent
    Ya, there's going on a cruise, and there's (none / 0) (#65)
    by sarcastic unnamed one on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:26:36 PM EST
    travelling. We've done a good bit of the latter and a little of the former.

    Parent
    In FL I think the cruise answer would be (none / 0) (#38)
    by ruffian on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 01:55:44 PM EST
    Yes=non-elite. Everyone does it at least once. Non-elites go back for more. I have been persuaded out of trying it by my very elite friends who tried it and express sentiments similar to yours.

    Parent
    Went on a couple of Windjammer cruises (none / 0) (#97)
    by MO Blue on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 03:03:52 PM EST
    Enjoyed those. Much smaller. Largest passenger size at the time was about 128. Wide variety of interesting people on board and because of the size and a totally informal sitting arrangement, you managed to talk with most of them.  

    Parent
    Foodie (none / 0) (#60)
    by Stellaaa on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:19:28 PM EST
    Does your cooking involve more than three animal products per dish?

    Did you eat in a restaurant that had the word confit on the menu?  Extra points if you knew what tha was.  

    Have you used bacon in ways that it was not intended?  ( this is a trick question )

    Did you ever call bacon some foreign name?

    Do you know people who are prohibited from eating bacon?  

    even better (none / 0) (#62)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:22:15 PM EST
    Do you know people who are prohibited from eating bacon but eat it anyway.

    Parent
    Actually (none / 0) (#73)
    by Ga6thDem on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:31:28 PM EST
    I have a Jewish friend who when we went to a sub shop said I try not to eat pork but then I went to her house one time and she was serving her kids pork chops.

    Parent
    one of my coworkers (none / 0) (#77)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:35:36 PM EST
    has a sign over his desk that says "bacon loving jew"

    Parent
    Hey, have you read David Rakoff's latest book? (none / 0) (#76)
    by ruffian on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:35:12 PM EST
    And no, that is not a question on the quiz. He has a very funny chapter and interesting chapter about various levels of observance. His basic thesis is that eating bacon because you are free to eat bacon is a blow for religious freedom and should be done often.

    Parent
    tanks (none / 0) (#78)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:36:16 PM EST
    for the tip

    Parent
    Just finished the audiobook (none / 0) (#99)
    by ruffian on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 03:26:52 PM EST
    which he reads himself. I've always liked his writing, and he has a nice voice too. It is called "Half Empty".

    Parent
    Gotta fill me in... (none / 0) (#90)
    by kdog on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:45:06 PM EST
    on the trick to the bacon question...because if there is a way to use it I haven't tried I damn sure wanna try!

    Parent
    obviously (none / 0) (#92)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:47:23 PM EST
    bonus question (none / 0) (#63)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:22:58 PM EST
    would you consider eating something you killed with your car.


    Depends (none / 0) (#67)
    by Militarytracy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:27:24 PM EST
    Maybe next year

    Parent
    What something? (none / 0) (#105)
    by waldenpond on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:30:09 PM EST
    Raccoon? No.  Can I have a deer?

    Parent
    thats why I asked the question (none / 0) (#108)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:35:17 PM EST
    I once killed a deer with my car.  about 5 in the morning coming home completely bleary eyed.  
    while I was standing by the side of the road wondering what the hell to do now my cousin (really, my cousin) came driving by on his way to work and stopped.  
    brief exchange of words, we toss the deer in his truck, he takes it home and gives my mom half.

    Parent
    Ha! (none / 0) (#110)
    by sarcastic unnamed one on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:44:49 PM EST
    I used to take acting lessons from Charles Nelson Reilly. He had a cousin.

    Parent
    I once (none / 0) (#112)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:49:52 PM EST
    met Charles Nelson Reilly at a party.  he had a very cute date.

    Parent
    What a great guy. I miss him. (none / 0) (#113)
    by sarcastic unnamed one on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:53:25 PM EST
    he was (none / 0) (#114)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 05:00:56 PM EST
    and that was a great party.  at the house of Peter Marshall of Hollywood Squares.  he married a close friend of mine so I would often get invited to parties at his house when I was in LA.  those Hollywood Squares people are some of the funnest people in show business.

    Parent
    Appears to be several closet (none / 0) (#82)
    by BTAL on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:40:50 PM EST
    Jeff Foxworthy's hangin' out here.  ;-)

    Are you Republican with a lot of money? (none / 0) (#86)
    by observed on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:43:34 PM EST
    Then you're probably elite.

    You scored 14 "elitist" points (none / 0) (#89)
    by Gisleson on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:45:00 PM EST
    Murray is an ass. I scored about like you because his talking points are a jumble of nonsense.

    I did a post much like yours then added all the reasons why this Iowa farm kid/former factory worker is hardly an elite. But then I created another elites quiz, one which most TL readers would ace.

    They don't care that you grew up working class, they want to smear everyone who's taken the time to learn how to eat healthier, ditch junk tv/junk sports, and live sustainably. Note that Murray could care less if you PLAY a sport. As a kid in rural Iowa I drag raced. Racing is a sport IF you're actually driving. Sitting in the stands? Not hardly.

    Murray pointedly doesn't ask if you enjoy NBA games, listen to music NOT played on Clear Channel stations, or take in ANY culture meant to make you think, not fall asleep. He is now and always has been a culture troll, writing whatever it takes to make the intellectually lazy feel superior for not having improved any part of their lives.

    Do these questions really have to be yes or no? (none / 0) (#95)
    by cawaltz on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 02:56:32 PM EST
    Do you make a six figure income?

    Do you have access to the corporate jet?

    Have you in the past 3 years had to put off paying an electric bill to put tires on a vehicle?

    If you received a 500 dollar bill in the mail would you be able to pay it without wiping out your entire savings account?

    What if you were the bartender for (none / 0) (#96)
    by Militarytracy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 03:02:43 PM EST
    Rotary Club?  What a bunch of fish!

    Think through a problem using objective facts? (none / 0) (#100)
    by BobTinKY on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 03:27:04 PM EST
    About anything?  

    You're an elite.

    Whole Foods or Food Lion? (none / 0) (#101)
    by Dr Molly on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 03:39:41 PM EST


    More Questions for Elites (none / 0) (#102)
    by ScottW714 on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 03:45:27 PM EST
    Do lower taxes reduce the deficit ?
    Were there WMD's in Iraq ?
    If Fox News Balanced ?
    Would you like to drink a beer with GWB ?
    Do we have the best health care, eva ?
    Is global warming a myth ?

    do you (none / 0) (#104)
    by CST on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:24:26 PM EST
    believe in evolution?

    Parent
    Could you be more specific? (none / 0) (#107)
    by waldenpond on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:34:30 PM EST
    Skiing... uh, so I ski.... does it matter if you get your gear at a thrift store and have been towed behind a snowmobile?

    Mountain Biking.... does your bike cost $2700 or $180? and do you wear those toe clips and matching gear or cutoffs, t-shirt and sneakers?

    I'd be a lot more (none / 0) (#109)
    by eric on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:40:39 PM EST
    elite if I wasn't raised poor in a small town.  But I didn't have anything to say about that.

    Shouldn't there be a question in there about drinking a latte?

    so was I (none / 0) (#111)
    by Capt Howdy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 04:48:47 PM EST
    but I still feel singularly elite

    Parent
    I remember when it was Chardonnay (none / 0) (#118)
    by Militarytracy on Wed Oct 27, 2010 at 07:19:42 PM EST
    that made us all elite, but that's so yesterday.  What is it now?  Pinot Grigio?

    Parent
    tough call (none / 0) (#121)
    by cpinva on Thu Oct 28, 2010 at 04:48:40 AM EST
    "Treasure of the Sierra Madre", or "The African Queen"?