Al-Qaeda Promotes Lone Terrorist and Aims for Suburbia

Thanks to Wired for publishing the full version of the new issue of Inspire, the magazine of al-Qaeda Arab Peninsula (the rest of the media and the corporate terror-monitoring sites either just refer to it or want you to buy a subscription to access it.)

Apparently, the U.S. has made air travel so problematic, AQAP is recommending alternative ways to terrorize those in the U.S. [more...]

Wired reports:

One suggestion, penned by “Ibnul Irhab” in the new issue of Inspire, is to run up on parked cars with gas cans and a matchstick. “How safe will the West feel when parking their cars, knowing they’re up for a TORCHING,” Irhab writes. His helpful tips: avoid CCTV cameras; hide the gas in an apple juice bottle; and, importantly, “don’t get petrol on yourself.” This is what Open Source Jihad bills as “America’s worst nightmare.”

Nor is it safe to drive to the store or the office. Inspire encourages the inspired to smear “lubricative oil” on roadways right before sharp blind turns to cause a traffic accident. (“Demolition Derby Style,” it promises.) If that doesn’t sound terrorist-y enough, another tip is to hammer nails into a pegboard painted black so oncoming cars blow out their tires. There’s even a chart explaining the physics behind car crashes for Inspire’s slower readers.

It's called Operation No Parking:

On page 10, AQAP publishes a hit list it calls "Wanted: Dead or Alive for Crimes Against Islam." It includes: Molly Norris, Ayaan Hirsi Ali, Flemming Rose, Morris Swadiq, Salman Rushdie, Girt Wilders [sic], Lars Vilks, Stephane Charbonnie, Carsten Luste, Terry Jones, and Kurt Westergaard.

The message on the cover:

There is even a picture of Trayvon Martin next to a photo of President Obama, with derogatory labels under each (I've left out the labels.)

A few articles are written by women. A few bash gay marriage. One defines al-Qaeda. Another says America will not profit from the death of Anwar al-Awlaki.

There are instructions for torching cars and causing car accidents and other disasters.

The theory seems to be to lay the economic tab on the insurance companies, and when it gets high enough, they will cause the U.S. to change its ways. (Rather naive of them.)

Highways are a good target:

There are best timing suggestions:

Other tips seem like a take on American culture. I wonder why, if they hate us so much, they use our cultural references when speaking to their followers. There's Chitty Chitty Bang Bang:

And wild west desperado-type images and slogans.

There's a q and a section. If the President is too big a target, try a past leader, like Bill Clinton or Condoleeza Rice.

The new emblem for the lone jihadist: A hoodie.

They remind their followers it's best to work alone:

What will be U.S. law enforcement's response to this? Unfortunately,probably more physical and electronic surveillance and traffic stops here at home.

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  • Display: Sort:
    Collective mental retardation is a bad thing (5.00 / 2) (#1)
    by Dadler on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 01:46:44 AM EST
    Whether practiced by AQ or Average American or Anywhere Nitwit. Right now, just about all of us seem to be suffering from it, whether directly or indirectly.

    And Enemy of Islam? These phucking champion halfwits can't even identify the real problems America fosters. This is why these swaths of the world should be left entirely alone, finally, to make their own mistakes, screw up their own history, destroy or recreate themselves with no meddling from outsiders.

    Maybe someday soon they'll be able to accept that being offended daily is part of life in a society that lets people do what they want, including freely practice their religion. Hey, I have to deal with being offended every day when, say, I pass a woman covered in a tent and hijab, while hubby is in cargo shorts, t-shirt and flip flops. I can't stand it, I want to humiliate those guys some times, but I don't. Because I live in a free country and that means I have to accept being offended a dozen times a day. (Personally, just get this moronically hyperliteralist religion out of my life. Jesus Moses Allah of Gawd, go the phuck away from me and stay there.)

    But when you mess with people and their lives and communities -- like we still do all over the world every day -- then you largely render them incapable of being rational when you want them to be. They just want to hurt something.

    Nice production values tho, at least it looks that way. As Fernando Llamas said, or maybe it was Billy Crystal, "It's better to look good than to feel good."

    The thing is... (none / 0) (#5)
    by jimakaPPJ on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 11:05:28 AM EST
    This is why these swaths of the world should be left entirely alone, finally, to make their own mistakes, screw up their own history, destroy or recreate themselves with no meddling from outsiders.

    They aren't leaving us alone.


    The other thing is ... (5.00 / 3) (#6)
    by Yman on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 11:14:39 AM EST
    ... we haven't left them alone.

    But coming from a guy who promotes the US propping up the Pahlavi dynasty in Iran, that's pretty funny.


    Why do they hate Trayvon? (5.00 / 1) (#7)
    by unitron on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 12:06:06 PM EST
    Doesn't George have enough problems already without these guys claiming him as a fellow Jihadi?

    And didn't they get the memo about Obama being a stealth Muslim?

    I guess they don't mind taking out Muslims (none / 0) (#2)
    by ruffian on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 06:27:59 AM EST
    on our highways in the name of sticking it to the insurance companies.

    Propaganda is propaganda. (none / 0) (#3)
    by EL seattle on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 06:48:38 AM EST
    If a church somewhere in the USA published an expensive glossy magazine with feature stories about effective ways to disrupt the funerals of suspected homosexuals, carefully phrased instructions for firebombing abortion clinics, and nostalgic accounts of "the best lynchings ever", I think it would be met with the same cricket chorus among the media as this schlocky effort is apparenntly getting.

    That's an interesting hoodie ad at the end, though. It looks to me like it's heavily influenced by computer game packaging art. It looks sorta like something from the Hitman series, or Assassin's Creed. I can't help but wonder if there aren't a few game publishers out there somewhere that are pandering to this audience a la Custer's Revenge, back in the day.

    All I could think was... (none / 0) (#4)
    by DebFrmHell on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 08:30:59 AM EST
    Oh, Good Grief.  More Hoodie controversy.

    i'm guessing a lot of their readers (none / 0) (#8)
    by cpinva on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 05:07:06 PM EST
    are "slow".

    There's even a chart explaining the physics behind car crashes for Inspire's slower readers.

    since most of the highways that are high speed would be interstates, the odds are pretty good that the wannabe terrorist will get run over, before getting a chance to lay down their "2"x4" o' nails o' death!". this seems directed at the, shall we say, more intellectually challenged of potential terrorists, those least likely to successfully plan and carry out a terrorist attack.

    this could actually be a devious method of skimming the terrorist DNA pool. get the idiots to go out, and get themselves killed, leaving only the smart terrorists to do the real work. or something like that.

    Did you read the small print (none / 0) (#9)
    by Peter G on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 07:24:40 PM EST
    on the page that includes the required postal mailing ownership information?  Are you there was no mention there of the National Lampoon as being the actual publisher of this idiocy?

    I couldn't get past "A bullet a day... (none / 0) (#11)
    by Mr Natural on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 07:42:26 PM EST
    ... keeps the infidel away."

    i hate to break the news to you, (none / 0) (#12)
    by cpinva on Sun Mar 03, 2013 at 12:16:51 AM EST
    but the Nat Lamp hasn't actually been funny for the last 30 years or so. kind of like SNL.

    could have been written (none / 0) (#13)
    by ding7777 on Sun Mar 03, 2013 at 08:09:05 AM EST
    for the NRA membership drive

    "Jihad for Dummies" (none / 0) (#10)
    by Mr Natural on Sat Mar 02, 2013 at 07:41:31 PM EST

    I have many Dummies books (none / 0) (#14)
    by Militarytracy on Sun Mar 03, 2013 at 04:37:22 PM EST
    It's just not up to Dummy quality and the grasp of facts that the Dummy books demand, it can't even touch Dummy information and quality :)